Glitter	All that glitters isn't good
	Showgirls (Fully Exposed Edition)	If this was a bigger pile, it would have to be shipped in two packages
	C.S.I. Miami - The Complete First Season	It's still good because it never was
	The Mirror Has Two Faces	And they're both pretty scary
	Mind Meld - Secrets Behind the Voyage of a Lifetime	Shot for a $1.50 in someone's back yard
	Chicken Soup for the American Idol Soul	When played-out trends collide
	Street Judge	Novel by Judge Matthis about a fictional judge named . . . Judge Matthis
	2 lbs. Swordfish Steaks	There's nothing like fish that's been in a box on your doorstep all day while you're at work
	Quincy, M.E. - Seasons 1 & 2	Enough said
	Call Me Crazy: A Memoir	Nutty as a squirrel turd
	The Other Sister	Never go full retard
	Fabio After Dark	Music for luffers
	Battlefield Earth	The only way it could be worse is if it were longer
	The Happening	The tree did it
	Failure to Launch	Refusal to watch